Eternal Threads of Truth

If you look closely you will see eternal threads of truth that weave meaning and purpose into the lives of each man, woman and child who transcends the mainstream illusion of reality by finding happiness and joy with each breath, each moment, each life experience. Throughout history, the individuals who have mastered the art of happiness all seem to share similar truths. They have come to understand that we are born to be happy from the inside out. They have learned that a purposeful life is made up of moments of joy and moments of sadness; that opposition necessitates appreciation and gratitude; that without the bitter we could not know the sweet.

Just as physical exercise is necessary to build the muscles in our bodies, life gives us exercises to build spiritual muscles in the shape of character, integrity, courage, compassion, empathy, charity, hope, faith and love. We tend to categorize life experiences as good or bad. Those that leave us feeling happy are good and those that leave us feeling unhappy are bad. We give the bad experiences labels and call them trials, adversities, struggles, crisis and hardships. Feelings of anger, frustration, despair, depression and anxiety that accompany these experiences may be seen as afflictions. Having attached negative meaning to these experiences, we determine that they are something to be avoided and resisted.

All experiences are part of our journey. All experiences have purpose and all experiences are a necessary part of the human condition. The experiences are neither good nor bad they just are. It is the meaning that we assign that determines how we view our experiences. We see life as we see ourselves.

For example, perhaps you have developed a victim mentality in response to life’s challenges. To make sense of your frustration, you blame extemporaneous events for your misery. Every person, every situation, every circumstance is part of a vast Machiavellian plot to steal your happiness. The driver in the car in front of you woke up today and decided to have car trouble just to piss you off. The woman in the checkout line brought her child to the grocery store specifically to annoy you. Your co-worker got pneumonia just so you would have to do her job. Negativity is no longer an option for you. It is a way of life.

The truth is a happy life or an unhappy life is chosen from moment to moment. Happy lives are stitched together one moment at a time with threads of kindness, charity, gratitude, compassion, understanding, empathy, forgiveness, hope and faith. To overcome being a victim of negative, toxic thinking we must learn that happiness starts with embracing and loving ourselves and with developing an understanding that all experiences have purpose and work together for our benefit. As we come to appreciate this truth, and understand what it means to extend love to ourselves, we become more authentic as we extend our love to embrace others. The extension of love to self and others expands the soul and the soul is the engine of happiness.

As part of the human condition we experience emotions. Emotions, feelings, our senses are what truly connect us to one another. We have different backgrounds, different cultures, different values, different lifestyles, different attachments, different fears, different strengths and different weaknesses. So, how can we possibly have something that we all share, something to which we all relate? We all relate to human emotions. Emotions are energy and energy is where our souls connect.

Every day, with limited words, filtered through our individual paradigms, shaped by our experiences, we try to communicate with one another. We try to connect. Unfortunately, actions sometimes are mistaken for motive; the message may be lost in translation; and, our inability to understand and to be understood causes frustration, anxiety, distrust, and anger. We may attach the negative experience to the person or persons; and, in the process, we remove their humanity from our consciousness. No longer as “human” as we are, we feel no reason to extend basic courtesies, respect, understanding or tolerance their direction.

If we could authentically feel someone's emotional experience, see it through their eyes, from their paradigm, we would intuitively understand their behaviors and we would have more compassion, empathy and understanding. The emotions are familiar to us, we recognize these feelings. We may not agree with the behaviors; but, we can feel the emotion behind the behavior. That would give us enough reason to offer, at the very least, passing consideration; because, emotion validates the essence of being human.

Some people are naturally more intuitive and empathic than others. These traits are simply more developed. For others, the experiences that illicit feelings of sadness, anger, frustration, despair and anxiety are opportunities for us to examine the behaviors we are choosing in response to stimuli. It is when we understand that our behaviors, not the experience itself, are causing our suffering we may appreciate the learning opportunity. As we process grief, disappointment and heartache, we have the opportunity to develop empathy, faith, compassion, understanding and hope. Some of the qualities and the behaviors associated with these spiritual muscles cannot be developed in any other way.

As we strive to live a purposeful life, we will gain insights, not only into our own soul’s potential; but, we also gain understanding and appreciation for the value of each soul. These are the seeds of unconditional understanding and love that we carry within. These qualities will help us to be kinder, more considerate and compassionate with others who are suffering. Choosing these behaviors toward others is more likely to generate feelings of happiness within ourselves; and, perhaps ease the pain someone else is feeling. But, we should never confuse unconditional love and understanding with the tolerance of bad behaviors within ourselves or others.

It is important to remember, we can love others, we can understand they are suffering and we can feel compassion; however, that does not mean that we should tolerate negative, toxic behaviors. When others are determined to continue along a destructive path, we do not have a responsibility to be collateral damage. We are not responsible for their choices or happiness. We can be change agents only to ourselves. Some people are so destructive, loving them from a distance may be the best choice.

When we accept that life has meaning, we may choose to give life purpose. With this choice we will experience a paradigm shift. We will see that every experience is an opportunity for growth and understanding. This does not free us from experiencing pain, sadness or heart ache; rather, this frees us to embrace those feelings, to choose to find the meaning so that we understand our purpose.

This is the secret-the eternal thread that connects each soul. The mysteries of life are discovered within the unfolding of the soul and happiness is sewn, one stitch at a time, as we embrace each experience, let go of resistance and live our purpose-filled lives one moment at a time.